Denver - Good afternoon, everybody! I discovered Sexy Seek Geo’s latest b/vlog. If you did not know, Seek Geo is famous for wearing black wigs with pink boas draped around his neck, whilst wearing yellow shirts. In fact, every now and then, you might catch him ripping his yellow shirts off and tossing them upwards whilst I declare, “Seek GEO! OFFSIDES!”

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with ya.

Anyway, if you’re at work and read this post, you might want to check out Seek Geo’s b/vlog about yawning. Or if you’re really a paranoid spy, this is definitely for you to watch, too. It’s really quite hilarious and I promise you one thing, too: you’ll be winking at the end of his subtitled video.

I am not kidding you!

So, check out Seek Geo’s latest here.

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie

Denver - Good morning, everybody! Life begins without DeafRead once again here on Paotie’s Green Couch. I bet many of you were surprised and I do not blame you - I was surprised myself! I did not even know I would have my blog’s feed cut from DeafRead until after I had published the article!

I am not kidding you!

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’ll. Can ya dig it, ya’know what I’m sayin’?

I got lots of emails from readers asking me why I decided to part ways with DeafRead, and so, let me explain briefly: I’m moving on to other things - simple as that.

I also want to thank many of you for the support you’ve shown, both by continuing to come back to the Green Couch, and by commenting/emailing me. We have had some great times at the expense of DeafRead and well .. it’s time to move forward now that the “Special Needs Deaf” version of DeafRead is being implemented.

My blogging will branch out into other arenas, issues and topics beyond the usual deaf-related articles I’ve been writing. There will also be changes to the Green Couch in the upcoming weeks that I want to share with all ya’ll.

In the meantime, let’s see what kind of trouble we can find on the blogosphere and have fun doing it.

Good times! Great vibrations!

Next!

See all ya’ll tomorrow!

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie

Denver - Good evening, everyone. In tonight’s news, The Eitoap Press is reporting that a deaf political organization is now threatening the National Football League (NFL) with a lawsuit claiming discrimination. According to court papers filed last Thursday, former waterboy, Oral I. Tust, is claiming charges of audism based on the decreasing use of hand-signals during games and seeks $1.2 million in damages.

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’ll. Can ya dig it, ya’know what I’m sayin’?

How the hell are all ya’all? I’ve been busy doing all the things people ought to be doing outside on warm, spring days - like golfing, working on the old truck, skateboarding, and building a pink igloo out of ice cubes.

Anyway, a reader asked my opinion about this “DeafSide” business, but I don’t know nuthin’ - my DeafRead customization feature automatically prevents me from reading stupid articles by Deafhood voodoo priests and priestesses.

I’m withdrawing my blog from DeafRead.

As for the readers of Paotie’s Green Couch, stick around - let’s see what kind of trouble we can cause elsewhere on the blogosphere.

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie

Denver - Good afternoon, everybody! I hope you had a great and safe weekend! I saw last night’s television program, Sweet Nothing In My Ear, and I was truly impressed with Marlee Matlin! Now we know why deaf actors and actresses do not get many roles as deaf people in films - because deaf people over-act as deaf people!

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’ll. Can ya dig it, ya’know what I’m sayin’?

I got lots of emails last night and this morning from readers of Paotie’s Green Couch asking me what I thought of the movie. Instead of hashing out what the movie is about, I’ve decided to give all ya’ll a few other links to check out below:

Banjo

Candy

Elizabeth

The movie was aigh’t. Nothing magical about it. I do think Marlee Matlin really went for broke in this movie, as if she were trying to win an Emmy Award for best actress. For a two-hour television program, the movie superficially covered a lot of ground in terms of the cochlear implant controversy within the deaf community.

Not too bad. Nothing about the movie sticks out to me, other than the fact I noticed many people on the blogosphere have been asking, “Why didn’t they ask the boy what he wanted?”

Lots of deaf people believe that children should at least have some say with regard to the implant itself. I agree, but there’s a difference between my opinion and theirs that I’d like to point out.

First, I agree a child should have at least some input/involvement when parents are considering the cochlear implant for their deaf child. And when I say that, I mean in a manner that is only consistent with the child’s natural preferences inherent to his/her family, and not in accordance with some “Deaf Expert” who loves to state, “When I was a child, I used to think like you. Now, I am mindlessly stupid because I listen to the wrong people as an adult.”

Recently, a deaf blogger appeared on DeafRead with an article of an adult male trying to lure a deaf child “out of the darkness” that is the hearing world. For some reason or another, when I finished reading his article, a thought flashed through my mind: children should not talk to strangers.

In fact, there are some deaf bloggers who identify themselves as “militant” and see no harm in confronting oral deaf children in deaf residential schools, and this is what bothers me more than anything. I do not see children as political pawns, to be used and discarded when convenient. I do not agree with adults confronting someone else’s child in any type of “militant” fashion or other forms of coercion.

Children are children - leave them out of the politics.

Conversely, I am not particularly comfortable with endorsing implants for children as young as 12-months old, and there’s a simple reason why: if I had a deaf child, I would wait until technology was even better and less invasive. But that is my preference based on the fact that I have lived nearly all my life as a deaf person.

I love being deaf!

So, the movie wasn’t too bad. Jeff Daniels needs to work on his sign language skills. Marlee Matlin was overly dramatic at times. The grandparents were the sort that I’d love to sit and chat over mugs of Guinness. And the extremes shown in the movie served to demonstrate the extremes rather than preach a particular message to anyone, I thought.

The point of today’s article is that Sweet Nothing In My Ear was right about one thing: any decision that impacts a family ought to be the family’s and nobody else’s. If a family considers a cochlear implant for their child, then that consideration is for the child’s natural preferences, parents and family - and not about anything else.

What this means, is that people who are not family members ought to mind their own business when families make intensely personal and private decisions. If it ain’t your family, then you ain’t got any business worrying about other people and their families.

Well, anyway .. I’m going skateboarding again in a minute here, and before I head out into the wind, I want to ask those deaf and cochlear implant activists/advocates/militants one last thing:

Please leave children out of the politics - even when the politics are about them.

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie

Denver - Good evening, everybody! I hope your week is going excitingly! I also hope you paid your taxes because your taxes are what pays for wealthy politicians to do what they do best: lie!

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’ll. Can ya dig it? Ya’know what I’m saying?

Somebody out on the blogosphere published a letter that was supposedly written by a hearing student learning American Sign Language (ASL) at a university somewhere in Canada. And the someone apparently taught the student and her classmates lots of things about Deaf World - some of it true, most of it not, and all of it discombobulated.

I am not kidding you!

So! I felt inspired! I am in a giving mood today! In fact, I searched my carpet and finally found a long-lost letter from a hearing student that I met a few days ago. The muscular female student - who is actually an arm-wrestling professional in her spare time - and I chatted for about five minutes at a nearby Starbucks.

The long of it short is that I told her the basics about deaf people, culture and Deaf World. I even told her about a certain group of people who exist on the blogosphere and purposely try to inhibit parents from making wise choices about their children - other than the usual crap Dr. Oprah spews.

She had thought all deaf people were one and the same, until I pointed out that Matt Hamill was missing an entire lower lip lately, and then she realized the vast diversity that encompasses the community of non-hearing people. In fact, I told her that, “most deaf people - and some are more culturally deaf than others - are reasonable, everyday people who want to enjoy their lives. And that there are a few deaf people - very few - who lacked anuses.”

To her horror - I am not kidding you - and my amusement, she had thought I was being literal. I laughed and then she laughed and then together, we laughed and before long, we were like .. bawling tears with uproarious laughter.

And then I told her I was being literal.

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’ll.

Earlier, I had met the student whilst waiting in line to order my morning poison, and I’d already gotten a free large (ya’know, I am just not into these fancy, schmancy Italian words for sizes, all ya’ll - I’d just prefer, “small, medium, or large, ma’am.” Not this, “Oh viola ez la viola playing like la viola wit ze hoarse bow and an iced chai the size of a regular mug and not my frickin’ water-cooler at work, okay?“) iced chai, so I was a little hyper.

She had sat quietly when I had explained the whole fuss about deaf education. I noted that on one end of the spectrum, there were like, oral deaf people and these people liked to pretend that sign language was for apes. She choked on her drink and nearly spewed dark liquids and asked, “For real?”

“Fo’Realz.”

And then I told her about the other end of the spectrum, in which there were deaf people who rejected all things having to do with English and/or the hearing world in general. Through squinty, blue eyes hiding behind mascara-free eyelashes, she peered at me as I told her, “.. of course, there are just a select few deaf people on the planet without anuses.”

A brief silence fell before she laughed and then I laughed and then together, we laughed before I said, “I really am being literal.”

I explained to her that there were many hearing students of ASL that had been unnecessarily duped into thinking that all deaf people used ASL. And then I added the fact that there were some deaf people who seemed to believe that ASL itself was an orgasmic device of some kind or another.

These people, I had told her, were the kind of people who did not have anuses.

She laughed and then I laughed, and then together we laughed and ..

Anyway, I told her all the things she needed to know about deaf people, deaf culture and Deaf World. As it turns out, the blond student wearing the pink angora sweater through bulging, Hulk-like muscles, was set to meet a deaf man for a blind date later this month. She had wanted to learn more about deaf people, deaf culture and Deaf World in preparation for her blind date with a deaf man.

So, here’s the student’s letter, delivered in a tiny scrap of paper by pigeon-carrier:

Dear Paotie,

You were not kidding!

Jane Xxxxx, Xr., XhX., X.X.

The point of today’s article is that one person’s perspective of Deaf People, Culture and Deaf World does not mean that it applies to all, or most deaf people. Maybe some. But not all.

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie

Denver - Good morning, everybody! I hope you had a great weekend. Today’s article offers you a reminder to file your tax returns by tomorrow, Tuesday, April 15. For those of you who receive Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI) benefits, you may be eligible to receive an economic stimulus rebate - even if you did not file taxes last year.

Congress and President George W. Bush are providing American consumers an opportunity to stimulate the economy through economic stimulus rebates available to primarily the middle and lower classes. The hypothesis behind the rebates suggests that Americans, having extra money to spend, will spur the economy out of its current doldrums by buying more American products.

Some critics of the economic stimulus rebates note that many Americans will simply buy more debt, rather than get out of debt; other critics lament the possibility that Americans will end up buying more imported goods and not American goods, which wouldn’t help the economy. Still, proponents of the economic stimulus plan believe Americans can jump-start a sagging economy by spending extra money through the rebates.

Regardless, the deadline to file your tax return is tomorrow. If you receive SSDI benefits, you must file a tax return to receive the economic stimulus rebate.

SSDI: A reader of Paotie’s Green Couch emailed me and asked if I could find information regarding SSDI recipients (people who receive SSDI benefits). A couple links later, I found a few bits of information that some of you might find interesting.

(Note: This is a disclaimer - I am not giving tax advice, nor am I a qualified tax expert. This article consists primarily of information derived from Internal Revenue Service documents available at www.irs.gov. It is not to be construed as any sort of advice, other than what is stated on official IRS documents.)

• If you received SSDI benefits in 2007, you should have already received a Social Security Benefit Statement SSA-1099 form; use the SSA-1099 form to compute your earnings when you file your taxes for 2007 on a 1040A form
• You must have received more than $3,000 in SSDI benefits in 2007 to qualify for the economic stimulus rebate
• Supplemental Security Income (SSI) does not count as qualifying income for the economic stimulus rebate
• You cannot be a claimed dependent or be eligible to be a claimed dependent
• You must have a valid Social Security number
• For those of you who did not (legally) file taxes last year, click this link.
• For a list of YouTube videos (written text provided; captioning is not) explaining the rebates, click this link.
• To view the payment schedule (when you will receive your rebates), click this link.
• You can file your 2007 taxes and apply for the economic stimulus rebate online - click this link.
• The IRS has published an article specifically addressing those who did not file taxes in 2007 and are still eligible to receive the rebate. To read this article, click here.

Military Veterans: If you receive benefits from the Department of Veterans Affairs, you may also be eligible to receive the rebate. Click here to read more.

Late Filers: If you are planning to file your taxes late and need an extension, click here. Also, if you file your taxes late, your economic stimulus rebate will be postponed until after you have submitted your taxes.

Don’t forget!

Paotie

Denver - A deaf youth minister in Louisiana has been arrested and taken into custody for indecent behavior with a student at the Louisiana School for the Deaf. WAFB Channel 9 in Baton Rouge reported that Joey Eugene Thomas was arrested Tuesday after police interviewed him through an interpreter. Thomas is the 5th person in as many months to be taken into custody involving allegations of indecent behavior towards students at the school.

The latest arrest came after police discovered the 31-year-old Thomas had allegedly sent sexually-explicit cellphone text messages and emails to a 14-year-old female deaf student.

A police spokesperson also said police do not believe the two had sex.

A previous case resulted in four people being taken into custody for having an inappropriate relationship with a 16-year-old female deaf student at the same school.

Click here to read the original newslink.

Paotie

Denver - Good afternoon, everybody! I hope your week is going well! I caught an article on DeafRead that interested me, and in doing a little extra web-crawling, I found out lots more. Amazingly, there are militant groups within the autism community. And! Plus! One militant group has made death threats against people who disagree with them!

Wow! Militant groups making death threats!

What a concept!

Anyway, in another life, I worked in the special education field and had an autistic student in my class. He was a big dude and had an affinity for professional wrestling. He wasn’t Rain Man, but if there was one thing he loved to do, it was mimicking former professional wrestler/now actor, The Rock.

Usually without warning, he would stop swaying like he always did and point a finger to the sky and yell:

CAN YOU SMELL WHAT THE ROCK IS COOKIN’ TONIGHT

Anyway, back to the autistic community. Apparently, a law firm seeking to sue vaccine-manufacturers as part of a $20 million personal injury lawsuit involving autism and vaccinations is driving a major political fight within the autism community. On one side, some people believe vaccinations (or mercury, more precisely) cause some forms of autism in children. On the other are people who disagree.

One of those people is Kathleen Seidel, a controversial and well-known scientist/blogger, and she has now found herself smack in the middle of that lawsuit. Seidel wrote an article published at her blog (neurodiversity.com), “The Commerce of Causation,” in which she criticized the law firm litigating the personal injury lawsuit.

Four hours later, Seidel was issued a subpoena.

The subpoena is broad and demands Seidel to turn over personal information related to her blog, including the people she communicated or contacted with. This means the subpoena demands that she reveal all the information from her blog, presumably because there’s some purpose behind it. Like, discovering that Seidel is a paid informant - of the New England Patriots!

I am not kidding you!

I’m not an attorney so I won’t be saying anything about the legalities of the case, other than the fact the subpoena looks quite vindicative and unreasonable. It smacks of the old McCarthyism, in which if you were at least linked to someone, you had to cough up another 10 people’s names or you’d be accused of being a “Commie-lovin’ sonofabitch!“

There’s something else, too: the subpoena demands Seidel disclose contacts with “religious groups.” And not only that, it also says which groups, namely, Muslims.

Wow! A communist Muslim! I am impressed!

Who would’ve thought?

Last I checked, being a Muslim had nothing to do with having an opinion. Or even having an opinion had nothing to do with french fries, either. What do Muslims have to do with a lawsuit involving autism, anyway?

So .. many bloggers have blogged on the, “I am Kathleen,” campaign to show support and unity in response to neo-McCarthyism. If it could happen to Kathleen Seidel, it could happen to me. And to you b/vloggers out there with an opinion.

I also noticed that much of the subpoena demanded Seidel to reveal, “any individual or organization working for or with” her be disclosed, and decided to add one little bit to the “I am Kathleen” campaign: because I blogged about Kathleen Seidel, I am a person who has “worked with” Seidel’s blog.

Well, imagine if there were LOTS more b/vloggers who “worked with” Seidel?

I love freedom of speech!

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie

Denver - Good morning, everybody! Today is the day many of you mixed martial arts (MMA) fans have been waiting a long time for: UFC Fight Night on SpikeTV! Deaf light-heavyweight fighter, Matt Hamill, faces a tough test tonight - but you can still meet him after the fight! Stay tuned for more information on meeting Hamill.

SpikeTV and UFC team up tonight to present UFC Fight Night, featuring light-heavyweight (155-pounds) title-contender, Kenny Florian, facing upcoming and rising star, Joe Lauzon. Read more about Florian’s fight with Lauzon here.

In the welterweight (170-pounds) division, long-time MMA stalwart, Karo Parisyan, faces a tough fight tonight against Thiago Alves. Both fighters have impressive resumes as Parisyan has fought a certifiable “Who’s Who” of MMA; Alves also has wins against a few big-name fighters in the UFC, although not to the extent of Parisyan. With a win tonight, Parisyan may be next in line for a title shot in the welterweight division. Read more about Parisyan’s fight with Alves here.

Long-time MMA veteran, Kurt Pellegrino takes on fellow lightweight (155-pounds) fighter, Nate Diaz (younger brother of Nick). If experience won fights, Pellegrino might have an advantage, but sharing a pedigree with one of MMA’s most notorious and well-rounded fighters has to help Nate Diaz somehow. This should be an interesting fight as age faces youth, and an experienced fighter matches wits with a young, hungry fighter. Read more about this fight here.

In one of the most anticipated fights of tonight’s UFC Fight Night, long-time MMA light-heavyweight beast, James Irvin, faces his toughest test yet against fast-rising star, Houston Alexander. If Irvin is the skilled technical striker, then Alexander is the polished street-fighter. Both fighters have knock-out power, and tonight’s fight will probably end with a KO. Read more about their fight, described here as, “The Perfect Storm.”

And now to Matt Hamill’s light-heavyweight match against Tim Boetsch tonight. Hamill was originally scheduled to fight Stephan Bonnar until Bonnar withdrew after suffering a knee injury. His replacement, Boetsch, destroyed David Heath two months ago with a first-round win. Hamill is a wrestling legend and faces a tough challenge in Boetsch.

Click here to see the rest of the fights on tonight’s SpikeTV’s UFC Fight Night 13 card.

Paotie’s PostScript: For those of you who are in Colorado such as myself, you can meet Matt Hamill tonight at a local restaurant. He apparently will not arrive until after 10 PM local time as his web site reported.

Doors open to the Broomfield Event Center at 2:00 PM - with the first fight scheduled at 2:45 PM local time. SpikeTV’s telecast begins at 5:00 PM local (MST) time.

Also, a new season of “The Ultimate Fighter” (TUF) begins tonight after UFC Fight Night. There is a new format this year as TUF alum, Forrest Griffin, coaches one team whilst light-heavyweight champion, Quinton “Rampage” Jackson, will coach the other team. UFC President Dana White has a “shocking” new development for this season’s TUF.

Enjoy the fights.

Paotie

Denver - Good evening, everybody! I hope all ya’ll have been doing well! April is here and that means the IRS wants to help you this year! All you have to do is buy your way into more debt with government-sponsored “stimulus packages!” And! Plus! I saw the recent CBS television show, Cold Case, the other night, and I was facetiously flummoxed and discombobulated! I was gerrymandered!

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’all. Can ya dig it, ya’know what I’m sayin’?

So .. yah. I watched Cold Case the other night and it was nice to watch. I mean, the plot was so-so. Acting was okay. A little eye-candy here and there. Nothing to write home about, really. A Deaf guy is murdered because his latently homosexual Deaf friend didn’t approve of his now-dead friend’s decision to have a cochlear implant.

Aigh’t?

Yesterday at Starbucks, a female, Hispanic friend and I were discussing the television show and its implications. I had recently met her a few weeks ago during one of her group prayer thingamajigs and had already given her a brief once-over in regard to the Deaf Community in general.

She was pretty, short and very thin, and her shortly cropped straight-hair gave her a sort of fragile and frumpy image. Through narrowed eyes that gave a look of intense concentration across her face, she asked, “Do Deaf people really feel that way about cochlear implants?”

“Yup.”

“Gosh! That is terrible!”

“Yup.”

“Why do Deaf people feel that way?”

Deaf people who were once oral and now selectively mute, I had told her, belonged to a self-anointed group called, “Great Ordinates of the National Anuses of the Deaf” - GONAD for short. These people, GONADs, believed they were God’s appointed representatives for all Deaf people all around the world - including those in China!

I explained more: all other Deaf people (such as those genetically-engineered to be Deaf), do not care one way or another about cochlear implants and that again, the only Deaf people whining about it were ex-oral-deaf-now-Deaf people. Through circularly wide and brown-eyes staring at me with heated and fierce intensity, she declared, “That is really weird.”

“Yup.”

“But why kill someone because they can hear? That’s not right.”

I explained to her that many Deaf people liked to believe that there are only two kinds of people on the planet: Deaf people and people with anuses. “You are either Deaf or you are an audist, hearing asshole,” I explained, “and if you are neither, then you are British and named Paddy Ladd.”

I am not kidding you!

I also explained that Mr. Ladd accidentally started a cult called, “Deafhood,” and that many Deafhood priests demanded Deaf people to attend seminars to learn things like, What’s Wrong With My Deaf Anus And Why I Need To Be Told What’s Wrong With My Deaf Anus.

“A religion? For Deaf people?”

“Yup.”

“Weird. That really is.”

I shrugged at her. And then we sat in awkward silence for a few moments. I took another sip of my iced chai and reflected back on what we’d talked about - I didn’t want to leave any doubt about the truth behind Cold Case’s episode left unturned. “It must be true,” I said to her as I began picking up my papers and books, “if it is shown on television, like on CBS.”

She laughed and took another drink of her morning’s poison. I smiled at her, wondering what she’d tell other people about our conversation involving the television show, cochlear implants, Deaf people, and even myself.

I gathered my things and put them into my backpack before I slung it over a shoulder. I shook her hand and realized she was already waiting to ask me something again. “Has it ever happened yet? Like, on Cold Case?”

I thought about her question as I let go of her hand before nodding. “Sure,” I said, “just like in most other cultures, there’s always a cultural asshole lurking in some darkened corner - ready to rip your eye-lids off for breaking an ambiguously unwritten or unsigned rule!”

“No, I mean .. has anyone died yet? Like, on Cold Case?”

“Oh! I thought you were talking about ass- .. nevermind. Umm .. no, nobody’s been killed over a cochlear implant yet.”

“Yet?”

“Yup.”

I rushed out the door because I was already running late to my next appointment, so I never got the chance to finish talking to her. Anyway, I have to go now - it’s:

APRIL FOOL’S DAY

HaHa!

I’m just messin’ with all ya’all.

Happy April Fool’s Day, everybody!

Be good .. or be good at it.

Paotie